November 2000

Faults

by
 Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and James Sniechowski, Ph.D.

Faults are thick where love is thin. 
English Proverb

Most of our "faults" are psychological in origin, meaning that we learned to think about some part of ourselves in ways that are not true. And then, because we can't see that we are doing this, we live according to false notions.

Judith was raised to believe that she was a real "girlie-girl." So, occasionally she'll complain that her purse is "too heavy" whenever an umbrella or camera finds its way inside. Or she winces at rain drops because they might "muss" her hair. Yet, most of the time she can hold her own with almost anybody and in most situations.

Jim expresses his love for her "faults" through his friendly teasing about how Judith can feel the tiniest pea beneath dozens of the thickest mattresses, and, more meaningfully to her, his growing respect for her genuine sensitivity.

When we open to recognize and respect each other's "faults," we set the ground for the deepest trust, because we know we are loved through and through, "faults" and all. And, after all, none of us go through this life without "faults."

So, please let more of yours hang out -- and be sure to keep yourself open to the care, compassion and humor that may be right around the corner!

Until next time, enjoy the Magic!

Judith & Jim

Copyright 2000 Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and James
Sniechowski, Ph.D., all rights reserved

Judith Sherven and James Sniechowski are:
Best-selling co-authors of  "The New Intimacy: Discovering the Magic at the Heart of your Differences:" and "Opening to Love 365 Days a Year"  http://www.thenewintimacy.com

They write a monthly column entitled "The Magic of Differences" for The Looking Glass magazine.

Judith & Jim also provide workshops, seminars and lectures to singles and couples nationally and internationally on all issues of gender and relationships. They also consult to corporations on these issues. They've worked with 100,000 people to date.

They also consult privately to couples and singles about intimacy and relationships. For more information please go to: http://www.thenewintimacy.com

MENSIGHT About Archive Links Advertise Submit an     article TMC Home CORPORATE SPONSORS Syndicated careers columnist Dr. Marty Nemko offers open public access to his archive of career advise: How Do I Become a Corporate Sponsor?   to subscribe to The New Intimacy e-zine. When the e-mail opens, put "subscribe" in the subject line and leave the body of the message blank. You will receive a confirmation request. When it arrives, just hit the reply button, sending it back and you will begin to receive "The New Intimacy."                         MENSIGHT