Psychic Fairs, Fraiser, and Men

Psychic Fairs, Frasier and Men.
April 2001

Elizabeth and I love the TV show "Frasier". It's one of the few programs we are addicted to and the only one of the four others which consistently prompts spontaneous laughter from us both. Admittedly the other four aren't sitcoms, The Practice, West Wing, CBS Sunday Morning and Movie Reviews so it's a no-contest in the humor department.

I like Frasier because I see so much of myself in the character, the judgmentalness, the pompousness, the narcissism, the holier-than-thou poses and it's refreshing to be able to laugh at those character flaws in him and at those things I recognize in myself at the same time. All of them were in full flower for me when I first began as a "reader" at psychic fairs around the country a few years ago. Here I was, an experienced professional psychotherapist reading tarot cards and giving advice in hotel conference rooms and civic auditoriums surrounded by the flotsam of New Age gee gaws like crystals, stuffed dragons, pyramids, "magic" stones, vibrating sleeping pads, magnetic pillows and signs proclaiming the coming of various "avatars" and "healers" not to mention some very weird people who claimed to be able to predict the future, heal whatever ails ya, and bring into awareness the series of past lives which have all culminated in and been the cause of someone's present hell on earth.

To say I was judgmental about much of it would be shooting very low indeed. As far as I could see I was surrounded by an ocean of charlitanism and fakery, by fools and foolers..........or worse, it seemed that some very crazy people were passing themselves off as the knowers of "truth" and it was to these to which the gullible and the desperate flocked for help and guidance. I was appalled to be a part of such a "show". It felt like the midway at a cheap carnival and I had signed on right there with the rest of the freaks.

The only solace I had was that I felt that I brought to what I did an honesty and genuine experience which could really help anyone who came to me in the midst of this "thing" in which I found myself. In fact that was my whole reason for being there in the first place. Having discovered I could use the tarot cards in what I believed to be a healthy and honest way, I felt I could be a "grounding" influence, a beacon in a sea of darkness.

You can see why I identify with the Frasier character right?

It wasn't till quite recently that I discovered that I am not the only "reader-advisor" who is both honest and professional. Much to my very pleasant surprise, there are many who feel the same way about what we do when we work at a fair. We are there to help and we go about it in a very intense and, because we have experience and some accumulation of wisdom, insightful manner. And we are not out to fool anybody. Not even ourselves.

This is not to say that there isn't a whole raft of b.s. going on all around us. There are fairy and angel mongers galore, and plenty claiming "special powers" which no one else has. There will always be these types and, sad to say, there will always be those who will seek out these services, people looking for magic bullets to solve real life problems.

At the last fair I worked (in Denver) I happened to be passing a table where a reading was in progress. What I overheard in passing was heartening. The reader, a woman I've worked next to on occasion over the past year was saying; "Look. You have got to take responsibility for your life. You are the only one who can make a difference in it."

"Ah!" I thought, "Another colleague."

Honestly, sometimes I see that there is more sanity at those tables than I used to experience in the mental health system.

At this last fair Elizabeth and I did a one hour lecture on "Relationships in the 21st Century". We haven't worked in that format in about a year and it was wonderful to see the turn out, about thirty people, and get the response we got.

There were more women then men, as usual, but Elizabeth noted something that I didn't see. We are male positive. That is not to say female negative by the way. It's just that we don't blame males in our workshops. As the lecture unfolded, what she noticed was that the men relaxed and felt more safe while the females, not all but many, grew more restive and defensive. Remember, this was not because we were attacking females, it was because we weren't blaming males either specifically or in general.

Over the last few years we have found this to be true on many occasions. If we don't blame males for the ills of society, for child abuse, for spousal abuse, in short if we quote the REAL statistics, females get defensive. One; because they don't have the information. And Two; they don't really know men.

It was a fine lecture. We got lots of applause from both genders and we hope to be able to do the whole workshop some time. Meanwhile, we will continue to disseminate genuine honesty and promote real healing with our work and I'll keep watching Frasier so I can remember to lighten up my self.

Coyote On Coyote - More about Coyote by Dick Prosapio

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